Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Round Three

Sitting in the infusion chair is scary. People think I'm brave....but I'm not. I cry every time. In order to live, I have to do it, sit there and take my medicine, but it's not easy. The Amazing Reese has been able to join me for every treatment so far, God bless him, but that's a luxury and likely will not last. So today? I'm alive and grateful for it. In this year long journey, the first half of phase one is finished. The tumors have shrunk -- significantly from the first treatment to the second, not so much from the second to the third treatment, but still shrinking. That's a good thing.

Thank you to the community of people both near and far who continue to reach out with offers of help and kindness. Though it's difficult, I'm trying not to compare my journey with others, because life isn't fair, and in any other circumstance, I'd sit and empathize with you about your aunt who lived for five years after a breast cancer diagnosis but died, right now I just can't afford to listen to those stories. For whatever reason, even the good stories can be overwhelming. I love people and value kindness above all, and appreciate that people don't know what to say to me, but maybe just being kind is enough. Maybe we don't always have to talk about cancer. Maybe we can just be.

Thanks for understanding.



8 comments:

Unknown said...

Love you.

Unknown said...

I love that you put your words so eloquently. I think about you often. Keep on keeping on that positive attitude. Love you Missy!

Unknown said...

Good Morning from New Mexico! When we share our pain we divide it and when we share our joy we multiply it! Right on Sista!

Sarah Hazel said...

Love you too

Sarah Hazel said...

:)

Sarah Hazel said...

I like that! Thanks

Aunt Nancy said...

I am sorry if this is redundant. I thought I left a message, but I think it disappeared. I don't know, maybe I left it somewhere else.
I saw you beautiful big grand baby the other day. I am amazed at how much he looks like Hilary and you. I know that he is at the board book chewing stage , but I know a book that I would like to share with you both.
The book is The Big Orange Splot. Every time I read it with children I show them pictures of the art you and your family created on your house. My favorite line is
“My house is me and I am it. My house is where I like to be and it looks like all my dreams," Mr. Plumbean said.- The Big Orange Splot”― Daniel Pinkwater

Unknown said...

Hello Sarah how are you?